The grieving process for the survivors of suicide is extremely agonizing. Because the death was self-inflicted, there is not usually an outside person or natural occurrence that can be blamed for the loss. Survivors may feel angry toward the victim for taking their own life selfishly, or they may blame themselves for not taking greater preventative measures. In some situations, a survivor may even be blamed by others (either close to the situation, or as a result of the media), which can result in extreme feelings of shame, guilt or anger. Also, because suicide carries a degree of social stigma, the family may attempt to hide the death to avoid public shame, resulting in a deeply internalized form of grief that can be very difficult to overcome. It is important for the bereaved to recognize that they are not the only ones in their situation. It is estimated that each year more than 29,000 people commit suicide in the United States, and that for each one of them, there are approximately six others who are intimately affected and must cope with the loss. Shock is often the first response, and is the body's natural mechanism for coping with an overwhelming situation. Many other startling and intense feelings may follow, including crippling levels of depression, anger at oneself, the victim, or others, guilt over actions that might have changed the outcome, or even relief that the destructive behavior and mental anguish of the victim is finally over. Time is often the greatest factor in diminishing the intensity of these emotions, but there are some things survivors can do to help themselves cope. It is especially important to maintain contact with other people during this time, as isolation will only intensify the problem. Talking is the best way to acknowledge the issues and to help everyone involved feel supported and reassured. Discussing the situation in a support group, with clergy, or with a mental health professional can be particularly helpful. Overall, the bereaved must acknowledge that they are only human. Such a realization can alleviate feelings of guilt and can also help when coping with stressful holidays or understanding that they may have questions for which there are no satisfactory answers. For more information, please visit: http://members.tripod.com/~LifeGard http://www.afsp.org/index-1.htm